It's Not Your Fault
by WolverinesDarlin
Summary: Nick is feeling bad about someones death. Was it his fault? or was it just a bad situation? Read and find out. Slight Nick and Ro, please review.


_Disclaimer: I do not own Left4Dead it belongs to Valve. Thank you. Takes place in that safe house in Hard Rain, I'm pretty sure the chapter is called Escaping Town._

**LEFT4DEAD**

Rochelle stood in front of the safe room door, she had shed the gas can and it was tilted up against the wall. The rain would pour then let up then pour then let up and it was getting annoying. She watched it rain and the infected stumble around outside. She had her fingers resting on the metal frame and could feel the raindrops splash on her fingers and slid off with the rest of the water.

"Rochelle…?" Ellis came up next to her; he looked very timid, his voice not carrying the usual happy tone and his face not smiling.

"Hey Ellis…" She looked at him a second before looking back outside at the pathetic scene in front of them, the entire street had flooded by now and there was no sign of it letting up.

"He's calling for you."

Rochelle nodded and turned around going down towards the way they came where they had set up a small area for Nick to rest and hopefully recover. She went down the stairs and knelt down next to his mat that she and Ellis had made up.

"Hey Nick…" She whispered, not wanting to startle him or wake up him if he was sleeping again.

"Hey Sweetheart." He greeted, his eyes opening just enough for him to see her.

Rochelle smiled painfully, just looking at him my her heart ache. To see him like this was awful. His vibrant green eyes ere dull and pained, his chest was covered in gashes and stabs and his right arm was limp and tore up. Rochelle tilted her head a little as she grabbed is decent hand in hers holding it gently as she stroked the side of his face with her other hand. "How're you feeling?" She asked him gently fingering his face gently.

"Been better…. How're you and the kid holding up?"

Rochelle nodded numbly and then laughed airily, "Better than some people."

Nick nodded a little and closed his eyes. "Got any water?"

Rochelle nodded again and released his hand and grabbed at the bottle of water next to his mat. "Yeah here."

Nick opened his eyes and waited as she propped his head up a little with her free hand and in the other tipped the bottle so that the water poured into his dry mouth. After a couple sips he pushed it away with his good arm. "Thanks."

Rochelle lowered his head back to the ground gently and recapped the bottle. "Rochelle I feel… I could have saved him."

Rochelle shook her head. "No…" She took his hand in both of hers; even with two hands she couldn't fully cover his massive one. "There was nothing you could have done, we don't blame you."

"He died." Nick shook his head and closed his eyes again.

Rochelle closed her eyes as well, rubbing small circles in his hand with her thumb. "You tried…" She whispered.

_/ / / "Alright, everyone got a gas can? Because we aren't coming back." Nick said opening the safe room door and stepping outside. _

"_Yes, we all have gas can's Nick. What put you in such a bad mood?" Coach asked stuffing the dwindling bar of chocolate in his back pocket._

"_I dunno," Nick put batted his eyelashes and folded his hands and held them up to his face. "Maybe it's all this rainy weather… It's bringing me down." He put the back of his hand on his forehead and made a dramatic pose._

_Coach just rolled his eyes and pulled out his axe, ready to cut off some heads. "Let's just go."_

_The four of them left the little gas station and went out into the rain as soon as they left they were hit with Spitter Goo, moments later Boomer Bile and then guts as Ellis shot it causing the fat zombie to explode on all of them. _

"_God damn I got puke AND goo on me!" Nick smacked at anything that came his way grunting with each hit he made._

"_Ah Smoker's got me!" Ellis screamed as he was dragged behind the gas station. _

"_Ellis!" Rochelle yelled and ran after his retreating form, shooting at what she assumed was the tongue. _

_Ellis disappeared behind the wall and she ran faster through the knee deep water. When she turned the corner she was met with a Smoker pummeling him. She walked up right next to the Smoker as he hit the defenseless mechanic and aimed her Magnum with his skull and pulled the trigger, the Smoker dropped as did Ellis, smoke filling the air around them._

"_Thanks" Ellis coughed as Rochelle pulled him to his feet patting his back and sent him a small smile._

_The two of them ran back to Nick and Coach to be met with a heated argument already in play, both were standing in the middle of the abandoned road. _

"_Well maybe I wouldn't have shot you if you weren't such an idiot!" Nick shouted holding the offending weapon in his hands while glaring at Coach. Rochelle looked up at the sky as it opened up, letting down a downpour of hard rain._

"_Well I'm thinking you need to work on your aim conman!" Coach shouted over the white noise of rain, clutching his arm where blood seeped through his fingers._

"_My aim is fine it's when idiots like you step in my way." Nick fired back and slung his weapon of choice, an assault rifle, over his shoulder._

"_Shuddup Nick." Ellis said as he walked up next to Coach and started bandaging his injured arm, Coach relaxed and allowed the young mechanic to do his work. _

_Nick opened his mouth for a comeback but snapped it closed when Rochelle gave him a hard look._

_Rochelle shook her head in disappointment at both Coach and Nick but decided not to say anything to add to the growing flame these two were feeding. "Let's just go."_

"_Hold on a second Sweetheart." Nick called out just as Rochelle was about to walk into the large field._

_Rochelle stopped and looked over her shoulder at Nick who was in the process of lighting a pipebomb. "We don't want anymore… misfires now do we?" Nick sent Coach a look who replied with a scoff and rolling his eyes._

_Rochelle sighed and watched as Nick threw the bomb into the field waiting for the explosion as its beeping echoed in the deserted sugar mill._

_The explosion sounded and Rochelle started to walk in when she heard a horrifying and familiar scream._

"_Shit"_

"_Tits"_

"_Damn it"_

"_Aw shit"_

_Everyone backed up away from the field to buy some time as the witch ran out, but instead of going for the man who had thrown the offending bomb she went after the injured Coach. _

_Coach cursed and tried to run from the furious woman as she chased him down, arms spread wide almost as if she wanted a hug, but her dangerous looking hands prevented anyone from accepting the invitation. _

_Coach ran away from the Witch and ran behind the gas station that Ellis had been taken behind only moments ago, everyone followed the Witch; firing at her the whole time as Coach ran firing his Magnum behind him but even with the huge onslaught of bullets the Witch persued._

"_I'm reloading!" Ellis announced and Rochelle cursed as she admitted the same thing, only Nick had bullets and continued firing._

"_No!" Nick yelled angrily at the Witch when she caught up with the tiring man and practically tackled him to the ground and slashed him open. _

_Rochelle and Ellis both finished reloading and started firing on the Witch that was hovering over their friend, Nick already on the scene but too late. The Witch finished Coach and turned on Nick._

"_NO!" Rochelle screamed and doubled her pace getting to her dying friends but right as she got up next to the screaming banshee her AK ran out again. She cursed and threw it to the ground instead of reloading and pulled out her Magnum and fired it into the Witches skull three times, dropping her._

_Rochelle huffed and fell to her knees pushing the dead infected off of Nick's shaking body and examined him._

_Nick had his hands above his chest holding them close as he shook violently in pain and blood loss, the pool of blood already too large. He had gashes covering his neck and face one of his arms looked like someone had taken a carving knife to it and scrapped off skin. _

"_Nick…" Rochelle grabbed her health kit off her back and ripped it open with her teeth before pulling out the gauze and the morphine and other supplies, using them all to fix the conman up the best she could._

_She looked over her shoulder to see what was happening to Coach and Ellis and when she saw Ellis was already working on him she refocused her attention on Nick. She fumbled with bandaging his mutilated arm, neck, and chest the cold rain making her numb._

_Nick's breathing became more shallow and he continued to shake, his hands fisted against his chest as if trying to come into himself to make himself warm. _

"_Shit." Rochelle breathed, she'd never seen Nick look so bad. She finally finished up wrapping his arm when he grabbed her shoulder his green eyes wide and looking her right in the eye. "Coach." _

_Rochelle turned and faced behind her where she knew Coach was being taken care of by Ellis only to see not a fixed Coach but a limp one with a mourning mechanic._

"_No…." She whispered as Ellis stood up slowly and walked over to her. _

_Rochelle stood and met him half way, "Ro'…" Ellis looked down and away from her but after a moment he looked back up to her and shook his head. _

"_Damn it." Rochelle let out a heavy breath and wrapped her arms around her waist. "Alright let's get outta here." She put a gentle hand on Ellis' shoulder before turning around and getting ready to move Nick and keep moving, back to the docks._

_Ellis and Rochelle wrapped both his arms around their shoulders, and helped keep him standing by wrapping their own arms around his waist. Nick groaned at pain of standing and having people touch his fragile waist and arm. _

"_Why aren't one of you helping Coach?" He asked pathetically, watching as they started to walk past the body of their friend._

"_He didn't make it Nick…." Ellis said quietly._

"_What? No!" Nick shouted in protest and fought their grip to try and get to the large man._

"_Nick stop! He's gone, there's nothing we can do!" Rochelle tried to reason._

"_No! It's my fault! I should have been the one to die! Not him!" Nick continued to fight._

"_Nick stop it! Just stop!" Ellis yelled at the frantic conman. "What do you think fighting us is going to accomplish? You'll just draw attention to all of us and then we'll all be dead! Do you want to get ALL of us killed?" _

_Nick stopped fighting their help and stopped shouting and just became limp and quiet. "No." He said finally._

_Rochelle was surprised to see Ellis get like that he was usually laid back and gentle. To see him order the usually stronger and more up front conman like that was strange at the least. The last time Nick had shown any emotion aside fromo anger was at the Carnival when he praised Ellis for getting them out of the mall. To see Nick look so emotional and distraught was unsettling._

"_Good. Now let's go." Ellis ordered and the three started walking back the way they came. / / / _

"Trying wasn't good enough…" Nick said quietly, "It was all my fault, I shouldn't have thrown a pipebomb in there like that." He looked away from her and pulled his bad arm close to his chest.

Rochelle sighed when Nick started shaking again. "Are you cold?"

Nick just shook his head and continued to look away from her. Rochelle furrowed her brows and sighed again before releasing his hands and cupping both side of his face in her hands.

Nick's eyes were filled with tears and started to trail down his cheeks, "Sshh…" Rochelle cooed and wiped the tears away with her thumbs. "Sshh…" She leaned is close as Nick continued to cry and mourn the loss of their friend. Rochelle touched her forhead to his and just let them be close for a moment while she stroked his hair back with one of her hands.

Moments later Nick stopped crying and soon the shaking stopped as well. When she pulled back his eyes were closed and his breathing deep and even. Rochelle frowned a little at seeing Nick so hurt and vulnerable to his emotions. He was a conman, he was good at hiding his emotions and seeming stone cold, but his experience and the guilt he was feeling was making him express himself in ways he never would have before.

"Ro…?" Ellis asked from the top of the stairs.

"Yeah Ellis?" She stroked Nick's hair back from his face and kissed his forehead before standing up and walking up the stairs.

"Is he alright?" Ellis looked so scared and forelorn it was just as bad to see him like that as it was to see Nick so hurt and emotional.

"Yeah. He's gonna be fine Ellis, just a little beat up is all." She grabbed a water bottle from the table by the door and popped the cap.

"He blames himself doesn't he?" Ellis put his hands in his pockets and stared down the stairs looking at Nick's sleeping body.

Rochelle let out a small sigh and sipped from the bottle before walking over next to Ellis and joining him in watching Nick sleep.

"Yeah he does."

"He doesn't have to… he didn't know."

"I know that, and you know that but he doesn't believe it." Rochelle shrugged a little and took another sip. "He's gonna have to get past this. All we can do is remind him it's not true and help him get better."

Ellis nodded, "I hope he can get past this Ro'. It just seems so wrong to see him like this."

"I know Ellis… I know." Rochelle put her arm around his shoulders and guided him to the chairs in the corner of the room, waiting out the storm and Nick's injuries.

**LEFT4DEAD**

_Man, I don't really like how this came out. But I already wrote it out. So there's no point in not posting it right?  
So I hope it wasn't too bad, lemme know what you think, was it bad? If so what about it was? I'm just sensing something was off…. So._


End file.
